Why, it takes nearly an entire minute to write a single coherent thought.

Who has that kind of time?

That’s why I’m now using Phoneme to keep all my friends up to date.

Phoneme allows me to send a single grunt, moan, or schwa sound to hundreds of followers all over the world, instantly. In turn, they can gasp, tongue-click, or glottal-stop their followers, and so on.

It’s great, and a real timesaver.

Or, as I just "phonemed" my followers: Ð!