Windows Vista: a new world of potential frustration

From the BBC — the fine print in the new version of Windows grants Microsoft the right to delete whatever it wants to from your computer, and there’s nothing you can do about it:

Vista’s legal fine print includes extensive provisions granting Microsoft the right to regularly check the legitimacy of the software and holds the prospect of deleting certain programs without the user’s knowledge…

Vista also incorporates Windows Defender, a security program that actively scans computers for "spyware, adware, and other potentially unwanted software". The agreement does not define any of these terms, leaving it to Microsoft to determine what constitutes unwanted software… even though that may result in other software ceasing to work or mistakenly result in the removal of software that is not unwanted…

For those users frustrated by the software’s limitations, Microsoft cautions that "you may not work around any technical limitations in the software"…

Sweet deal.  (Disclosure, umpteenth time: I’m an Apple shareholder.)

Boston terror over the Mooninite invasion

Sigh. Too many grown-ups not watching enough cartoons.

In an echo of the kind of paranoia that thought rock music was a communist plot, and which led some people to duct-tape their entire houses against an exaggerated anthrax threat… today, Boston called out the bomb squad to handle the Mooninite invasion.

Which consisted of — prepare to be very, very frightened now — small blinking lights in shape of cartoon characters. AAAAIIIEEEEE!

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Jeebus. I mean, I’m as big a coward as there is on the planet, but there’s a bigass billboard of a Mooninite giving people the finger, right down the street from where I’m sitting, over on Pico Boulevard in Venice. And somehow nobody calls Homeland Security.

Is Al-Qaeda really going to attack by decorating its bombs with blinking lights, specifically calling attention to the bomb?

This is worse than the freak-out people had over musical newspaper vending machines. Remember that? Somebody hears the Mission: Impossible theme coming from their newspaper box, so the cops come and blow everything up, just to be certain? Because terrorist explosives always come with a recorded soundtrack.

Wow. America really has to start watching Adult Swim. Anybody who doesn’t already faithfully watch Aqua Teen Hunger Force frankly deserves to panic blindly.

UPDATE: While we’re at it, here’s the trailer for the upcoming Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie, plus a clip, because I like you and want you to be happy.

I am counting the days.

 

I’d settle for a “Not Starting A War With Iran For Dummies” at this point

Laura Bush announced yesterday that the White House has a new pastry chef named Bill Yosses.

Read closely, and you’ll notice Laura’s official release mentions pretty much every credit the guy has… except this one:

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Nice to see that at least one person in the White House knows where they’re coming from.

Maybe Laura can talk her husband into hiring the authors of, I dunno, Iraq For Dummies, The Constitution For Dummies, International Law For Dummies, or Paying The Slightest Attention To The Will Of The American People For Dummies.

Hat tip: On Deadline.

I’d settle for a “Not Starting A War With Iran For Dummies” at this point

Laura Bush announced yesterday that the White House has a new pastry chef named Bill Yosses.

Read closely, and you’ll notice Laura’s official release mentions pretty much every credit the guy has… except this one:

Active Image

Nice to see that at least one person in the White House knows where they’re coming from.

Maybe Laura can talk her husband into hiring the authors of, I dunno, Iraq For Dummies, The Constitution For Dummies, International Law For Dummies, or Paying The Slightest Attention To The Will Of The American People For Dummies.

Hat tip: On Deadline.