True story: this little fellow gently nudged his nose against my hand through the mesh, moments after this picture was taken.
This endowed me with a power known as The Nuzzling, and it is the most fearsome force in all pududom. Whenever I shake someone’s hand, I now have the power to see two and a half seconds into their future.
Usually what I see is us still shaking hands. Pretty much always, actually.
Sometimes we’re not. Occasionally there’s a hug. Not much else so far.
Pudus are very small.
While reading this post over at the General’s place, about heroic Americans reporting people dressed as ninjas to the British police, I learned today of the Air Force’s Eagle Eyes website, which actually includes a guide to spotting and reporting terrorists.
Among the things you are instructed by the Air Force to watch out for (I kid you not):
If you see anyone engaging in these activities, report them immediately to the nearest… um… authority… erm… oh, never mind that.
Still, alert your friends to the, um, whatever! Email them this post!
Remember: vigilance is the eternal price of, uh, something!
Since your IP now gets logged pretty much anytime you open the stove,
visit the bathroom, or run the dishwasher, Sitemeter can slap together
a nifty little graphic of the home countries of this site’s last 100 visitors. It usually looks something like this:
It changes constantly, of course, as different countries wake up, go to
sleep, and occasionally collapse in genocidal ruin. But it’s fun to
think about people from Vietnam and Croatia and Finland
dropping in. And what I’m happiest about most of all are readers from
the Unknown
Country, who seem to be among the site’s most loyal.
I’m not sure where this Unknown Country is. I’ve checked my atlases and poked around Google Maps. Nothing.
The phrase is, however, notably similar to the term Hamlet used to describe death.
Logically, then, I can only assume that Sitemeter is telling me that dead people are big fans of the site.
Yay! Dead people are always welcome here. A lot of people fear the
dead, but if you think about it, dead people are responsible for most
of the great art and culture we have, not to mention the only decent
pop music in the last fifty years.
But since there’s rarely more than one dead person online at a given time, I also
conclude that internet access is poor in the Great Beyond, and they’re
probably sharing a computer. Possibly my last Mac, which died abruptly
three years ago.
Still, what an opportunity. So many things to ask the dead. Like, are
you still using Explorer, or has Firefox made it to the other side?
Are pudus cute there, too? Who wins in a slap-fight, Jesus or Buddha?
How many of you guys thought you were following the right leader, but
now realize you were just part of getting a whole lot of people killed
for no good reason? Does that suck forever, or can you, like, laugh
about it once a few centuries go by? Those 72 virgins that every
suicide bomber gets —
is there, like, a machine that makes those? Because that’s a lot of
virgins. And do they ever blow themselves up? Because if I was a
virgin and the only hope for love I had for all eternity was an average
of 20 minutes a day with a perpetually-exhausted maniac, I’d probably
strap on an explosive belt myself and take my chances in the Great Even
More Beyonder.
Whew. I have more questions, but that’s a good start for now.
Anyhow, send me an email. Or just make Jon Edward belch the answers, one letter at a time. Thanks!
Wasn’t sure what category this belonged in. Finally decided fortune cookies are media.
After all, they’re certainly at least as accurate as anything on Fox.
Today’s speech, which turned out to be about as major a release as
"Stealth" (which you’ve probably already forgotten seeing the ads for),
was delivered from… the Naval Academy.
Bush’s speech before that? An Air Force base.
The one before that? Yep. Another air base.
Before that? An Air Force base.
And before that? Bush got creative this time, and went with an Army depot.
Uggabugga has put together a detailed graphic of Bush’s public speeches for the last six months.
Il Duce seems to be completely unable to allow any significant chance of making eye contact with anyone who disagrees with him.
It’s pretty creepy.