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Meet two members of the Royal Scotch Guard, whose uniforms never need cleaning:
Don’t ask what’s in the groin-level fanny pack deals. Unless you’re up for a Justin Timberlake thing.
In which case, you might need some ScotchGuard of your own.
PS — yes, I know the fanny pack is technically called a sporran. But it’s still a fanny pack. That’s what sporrans are.
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